Stay at home mom burnout is REAL, but it can also be a huge turning point in your life as a mom. I know, because it happened to me. I struggled with wanting to be a SAHM, yet feeling unfulfilled at the same time. I was unhappy, ashamed, and honestly–I was anxious. My lightbulb moment was realizing that I was always more than JUST a mom. That one realization catapulted me into action and back into finding my happy again.
The life of a SAHM is all consuming. You can lose yourself, and your happiness along the way. But, admitting you’re unhappy can be just the trigger you need to start living the life you want as a mom, and as YOU!
Unhappy Stay At Home Mom Slump
If I were to ask you what brings you the most joy throughout your average day, what would you say? Let me be clear: I’m not asking you what things WOULD bring you the most happiness in your day—like a spa day or a date night. I’m asking you, what actually MAKES you the happiest each day (or most days)?
Simple question. But, it’s a really tricky question for a stay-at-home-mom.
If your answer is naptime and those hours of respite when the kids are at preschool, then your happiness level may be dangerously low. But, you’re FAR FROM ALONE! Stay at home moms deal with these very real challenges.
Being Unhappy & Admitting it Are Two Very Different Things
For a long time, I didn’t want to think about that question, much less answer it. If I admitted that I wasn’t happy, then I would feel LESS THAN—less than those moms who always seem to be happy and fulfilled with their choice to become a SAHM.
I would feel like there was something wrong with me for not finding that joy. So, I chose to ignore my feelings. I tried to convince myself that I was just being selfish, or unappreciative, or not living in the moment.
But, I WAS trying to live in the present moment. Deep down, I just didn’t like what the present moment was telling me. Does that sound at all familiar?
Denying how unhappy you are slowly erases you. It’s like saying your own happiness doesn’t matter—that you don’t matter. And, of course, it does and you do!
The Shame Hurdle
After several YEARS of this cycle, I finally discovered why I didn’t want to answer that simple happiness question. I was ashamed.
My shame came from the fact that these little beings didn’t fill my days with happiness beyond measure. I wanted more happiness than they could give. Ultimately, I wanted more from my life, and that carried a weight of shame that I didn’t want to feel.
Admitting that the happiest part of my day was increasingly becoming the slivers of time I had away from my children turned out to be my key to real happiness. It may seem a bit backwards, but once I was able to admit that one little thing, my life took a turn for the better.
Somehow, by simply admitting the truth to yourself, you can be set free. You can finally say, “Okay, this is true. Now, what?”
You Are More Than Just Mom
Figuring out the “now, what?” can become your source of happiness. It was for me, and I know it can be for you, too.
By freeing yourself, and acknowledging that you are unhappy with the status quo, you can magically make room for yourself again.
Rediscovering who you are NOW can energize your life, your marriage, and your relationships with your kids.
Perhaps the most profound thing that can happen is releasing your children and spouse from the burden of trying to make you happy. Somewhere along the line I made my family responsible for my happiness.
So, I had to shift that burden back where it needed to be—on me!
Figuring out where to start your journey can be the hardest part. So, I created the Not Just Mom Life Plan to help other moms find their happy, too!
The Not Just Mom Life Plan is a FREE, printable, 12 page plan to help you refocus your life. It is the exact plan I used to find my happiness in my role as a mom. It contains simple, customizable, actionable steps to help you create a life that makes you happy, satisfied, and filled with purpose.
The best part—-I have unburdened my relationships with my children. I’m slowly but surely becoming sillier AND more patient as a mom. Why? Because I am truly happier. When your happiness is genuine, it is palpable. And, there’s plenty to share!
The Not Just Mom Life Plan
Struggling with a lack of happiness can be crippling for a stay at home mom. And, admitting your unhappiness can be difficult. It can be the hardest thing in the world to do.
But, what you may imagine as a shameful experience could become the most growth-rich time in your life. By simply acknowledging the elephant in the room, you can free yourself to become the person and mother you are truly meant to be.
Once you do this, you make room for the real you! You can finally have that space you need to breathe again.
The importance of being a stay at home mom goes without saying, but there are many MANY reasons not to be a stay at home mom. There are also loads of options that can give you the best of both worlds. There is no reason to settle for less than what YOU truly want.
So, tell me, how happy are you?